SNORTING IN DERISION AT BORIS IN PEPPA PIG WORLD (3/10)

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As Boris praises Peppa Pig World and compares himself to Moses, we’re sceptical of wild talk. While Germany’s health minister says all his nation’s citizens will be either ‘vaccinated, recovered from COVID or dead’ by the end of winter, a new cryptocurrency called JRR Token has been blocked by lawyers for the estate of the creator of Lord of the Rings. Although Atom Bank is introducing a four-day working week, Jeff Bezos doesn’t believe in work-life balance because ‘it actually is a circle’. Bulb Energy’s critics say the company’s ‘greenwashing’ was the writing on the wall for its collapse.

FACING UP TO BAD TIDINGS

Some things are no laughing matter, with Britain’s workforce shrinking after a sharp rise in people leaving work during lockdown and AO World slashing profit forecasts. Compass Group’s revenues are down. Italy’s anti-trust authority is fining Amazon and Apple more than €200m. The FTSE All Share is sitting on the fence.

BUILDING FOUNDATIONS

Long sight is still an asset for some, with Biden confirming a second term for Federal Reserve chair Jerome Powell and El Salvador planning a volcano-powered ‘bitcoin city’. Miton Group has approached fellow rival asset manager River and Mercantile Group about a possible merger, while Netflix is buying the creator of Game of Thrones’ visual effects as South Korean horror drama Hellbound overtakes Squid Game as its most popular series. As Adele convinces Spotify to make music fans listen to her album in the right order, one artist has recreated Ötzi the Iceman’s 5,300-year-old tattoos on her body, using her own blood. And you can now sign up for Edison’s webinar on how digital healthcare can help build a healthy ecosystem.

DEALING WITH MATTERS THAT ARE NOT WHAT THEY SEEM

As Pets At Home’s interim profits soar 81%, ‘Run Run,’ the pet dog that killed ducks and chickens, turns out to be a fox. But Kaya, the kitten with a congenital facial abnormality, is still looking for a forever home after receiving zero adoption applications.

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